Milk Mustache & All
I’ve read a lot of blogs lately from other moms about how they feel towards their kids, towards their lives, and towards their situations. All situations are different and yet, so many of the feelings are the same. In general, we all feel inadequate at times and we all have our moments that we realize we’re doing okay with our kids, with ourselves, and with our situations.
In the last six months, I’ve felt so ALONE in some of my worst moments. I am alone all day with my beautiful hyperactive child. I am alone in my friends and family because I homeschool a young child. I am alone with my worries over starting menopause early. I am alone in my head 99% of the time haha.. oy.. it’s true! I worry over something for a long while before finally it spills over and I share with others. I try to struggle through my thoughts, fears, and worries alone for as long as possible or until I fix it.
Then I began reading other women’s blogs. The best moments of my past six months have been when I sit and read their words and feel their feelings all the way to my toes, when I sit in tears because I feel their pain and confusion, when I gasp in shock to read that they felt that same pang of guilt over the same thing as I did, and when I find myself laughing because what they are saying is silly! Of course they are good moms, of course they’re allowed to feel that way, and then there’s that moment when I realize I am too. Sometimes I cry again! It’s so very nice not to be alone anymore.
I take K to the park/McDonald’s play area every week. It’s been the one day of each week when I look around and think ‘yeah, I’m a pretty good mom’. I don’t sit and blatantly ignore her (no matter what I’m doing!) as I’ve seen other moms do. I make her eat her meal before she can play (I’m too strict on that rule usually) instead of making her take a bite once in a while and then tossing a completely uneaten burger. I listen to my headphones while she plays, but I can always hear the kids and I’m not shy to discipline her when it’s needed. Play time does not mean rules go out the window and she can treat others how ever she wants to or do the things they do (which is most often the case). My point is, I do my job. I watch, I listen, I guide, I discipline, I love, and I enjoy.
I’m afraid I also tick off other mothers! I’m finding out I’m pretty good at this lol. I am THAT mom.
I will take my child’s toys (which were on my table beside me) from your kid and put them back on our table when he grabbed it to play and you said nothing. You giving me a dirty look won’t stop me. We work hard for our things and they are not up for open share time.
I will stop my child and yours to ask them not to be so rough around the smaller children. I don’t care who the smaller children are, I will protect them as if they are my own from the older kids who are (after all) just kids and don’t think about what they do. If those smaller children are yours, you should have been there to stop the bigger kids before me.
I will blatantly tell my child (in front of God and everyone else) that while some parents allow their kids to do certain things (ie: talk back, yell at parents, hit other kids, climb up things they shouldn’t, etc) that I do not allow this behavior and if she can’t follow my rules we leave. When my child asks me why that kid is allowed to behave that way (talk back, yell at parents, hit other kids, take toys away, climb on dangerous things, etc.), I do not hesitate to tell my child it’s because YOU aren’t doing your job. It’s not your child’s fault that you are failing as a parent.
So to all of the moms who take their kids to McDonald’s or the park or anywhere else around other kids just to ignore them and let them behave like wild cats… I’m telling you now I will not apologize for being THAT mom!